Apotheosis
by Nessaiya
Summary: Apotheosis – Elevation of man to a God. Sequel to "Indignant".


**Story:** Apotheosis – Elevation of man to a God. Sequel to "Indignant".

 **Author's note:** Nothing work-induced this time… Well, actually, I was the one bullshitting a talk together this time (and nope, I did not annoy 30 other people for three hours, I was efficient and fast)…

 **Disclaimer:** Marvel still owns them. The blueberry's mine, though.

* * *

 **Apotheosis**

* * *

He is still smaller than her, even though in her Goddess form she lost an inch or two on the God, which means she is still towering over him as she makes him lay down in their bed and scoots a hand under his shirt, caressing up his abs and coming to a halt at his reactor.

She has to take it out, she says, and the casing also has to go, eventually, as his bones, muscles and skin will reform and knit themselves together, and while she seems happy that he will be whole again, that Damocles' sword of having shrapnel too close to his heart and reactor casing compressing his lungs will be gone, he is dreading it a bit, somehow.

He does not know whether he wants to see this gaping hole in his chest, if he can deal with it, even though he trusts her that the apple will work. Tony tells her just that, and it pains him that there are tears rolling down her face as she tells him that she cannot sedate him during the process, as it might tamper with the effects of the apple.

He has been through worse. Getting the thing in there was definitely worse. Still, he has to gather all his courage to not run away as Loki's fingers work quickly and efficiently, images of Stane taking out his heart while he was not able to move are still rearing their heads whenever _anyone_ is coming too close to his, and unfortunately, this still includes her.

He never lowers his gaze to his chest, even though he might be able to see his own heart beating. Tony keeps his eyes locked on the emerald orbs of his wife as he eats the golden fruit, stem and core included, and kisses her when he's done, sharing the lingering taste on his lips with her.

Re-growing bones, muscle, tendons and nerve-endings is a painful procedure, one during which Tony loses consciousness. Loki sits next to him, the entire time, making sure the shrapnel comes out first before the gaping hole is closing, somewhat glad that he is unconscious because it pains her to hear his moans and subdued screams. J.A.R.V.I.S. is there, talking to her, assuring her everything is fine, that he is monitoring his master closely.

She is sitting there, tears falling down onto the fabric of Tony's shirt which she didn't remove, she just opened enough buttons to be able to watch the process, her fingers caressing over the re-establishing skin, the thought of how he acquired this abomination making her sick.

She has to leave for the bathroom twice before there's not even a hint anymore that the center of his chest was anything else than smooth skin over taut muscles, blaming morning sickness and raging pregnancy hormones for her inability to just stomach the love of her life suffering.

She knows that it will take some time until the apple irrevocably has changed him, for now it has just worked on the most imminent damages. Strength and longevity need longer, need assessment of every single cell in his body, but they will have this time.

When J.A.R.V.I.S., truly a mastermind's creation and more of a friend and a companion than _just_ an artificial intelligence anymore, informs her that the repairs are done and that his master is rather sleeping than unconscious now, she just continues sitting there, fingers caressing over his heart.

* * *

She is still sitting there when he awakes, limbs and back sore, and she desperately has to go to the bathroom by now, but she keeps telling herself that she should be there when he opens his eyes, so she stays, one foot nervously bouncing against the bedding as a distraction from her strained bladder.

It is dark inside the room, darker than it has ever been since she moved in with him, and it occurs to her only now that the soft blue glow, the illumination that made it possible to watch his face when he was sleeping, and yes, she and her male alter ego are creepy in that way, has been the contraption in his chest.

The first thing Tony does when he wakes up is taking a deep breath, before making a surprised sound. Another deep breath, deeper, slower, follows, and then something that sounds like a strangled sob.

Loki instantly orders J.A.R.V.I.S. to put on the lights, hands finding his, blindly, so fast that they lace their fingers together before the AI reacts on her order. When the room is finally dimly illuminated she can feel these warm brown eyes on her, salty wetness threatening to spill as he looks at her, squeezing her hand.

"I can breathe", he mesmerizes and the first tear trails down his cheek, caught in the neatly groomed goatee he's so insufferably proud of. Loki is not far behind, damn those hormones, when he catches her face, ever so softly kissing her.

"I can breathe and it doesn't hurt", he repeats as if it's a wonder and Loki only realizes now that to him, it is. She only ever knew him with the reactor, and he never made a fuss about it, it was a necessary evil. But now that she knows all the damage that was caused to keep him alive…

The man just became a God and is crying over something he should be doing without even thinking about it, and she wonders what else will change.

His slightly hunched posture to keep from stretching the skin around the casing? The dyspnea after strenuous workdays, hour-long fights against the next best villain holding a grudge against New York, after a too thorough roll in the hay, leaving him gasping and coughing while assuring a freaked out Loki that it was fine, he just needed to catch his breath?

Now that she thinks about it she can come up with so many rituals in his daily life that most probably were installed due to pure necessity… small snacks or even fluid meals scattered all over the day, instead of larger amounts of food. This weird thing he called a nebulizer. Disinfectants and a fear of bacteria that went as far as not wanting to be handed things.

Measures that had to be taken because of this blasted contraption in his chest.

His thumbs caress away her tears, and he is kissing her again, forcefully, like a man who knows that he is no longer dying, and if Pepper told the truth she is in for a night of blissful wonders after some thorough crying. And yes, she and Anthony's CEO/PA have been gossiping, trading experiences once the redhead got over her feeling of _I got replaced by a bag of cats_.

She had left Anthony, and Loki's glad for that, because people may say what they want about her husband, but he is loyal and does not betray other people's trust in him, if Potts had wanted to keep him, he would have stayed with her.

Loki and Pepper have discussed this and came to the conclusion that Tony's better off now. Pepper always worried and could not understand how he willingly put himself in danger. It was eating her to the point she snapped and was making him feel miserable. Loki can understand his drive, the need to do what Tony does because _he_ is just the same. And while both of them love him with all their heart, Loki's outfitted better to handle whatever comes with his mortal…

That's when it hits her. He is not a mortal anymore.

Her hands find his face and she is really desperately ignoring her bladder by now, just a few more moments, mirroring the gesture he does with his thumbs, stroking over the still present lines around his eyes that are so much more prominent when he's laughing. They will be fading with time when the apple restores his youth.

He is not a mortal anymore. He will stay with her, watch their little blueberry grow up, he will cope with both bags of cats he is married to, because deep inside Loki knows that sometimes he or she is bordering on just plain insanity, not matter whether he is male or female. Even though the female counterpart appears slightly more stable if you don't take into account the hormonal crying fits and her sudden cravings for ice cream right now.

Maybe they can have something that borders on normal… whatever normal is, both of them don't really have any experience with that.

None of them has said anything since his revelation of lungs that are working properly once again.

"I'll be there", is what he says now and she curses him for it, because she is already a bubbling mess reduced to tears, and he's not helping.

"You'll be there", she echoes in a whisper, and he finds her lips again.

He will be there. That is all that matters.


End file.
